RAGTIME: Etiquette in 1906

"Etiquette is protocol, rules of behavior that you memorize and that rarely bend to encompass individual concerns and needs. Manners embrace socially acceptable behavior, of course, but also much more than that. They are an expression of how you treat others when you care about them, their self-esteem, and their feelings."

- Letitia Baldridge's Complete Guide to the New Manners

Etiquette in early 20th century North America was centered mostly around gender and the social perception of one's neighbors and acquaintances, and would even delve as specific as the way one would interact through invitations to lunch and dinner invitations. For the purposes of this show, the following excerpts from L.W Sheldon's book 20th Century Guide to Etiquette, which was actually entered according to act of Congress in 1901. These rules in particular apply mostly to the New Rochelle, NY folk; etiquette was considered exclusive and virtually only accessible to upper-middle class families:

"The man who loves will study to please his sweetheart. Not for worlds would he offend her with one sign of rudeness. The man who reserves his smiles and graces for women other than his wife is undeserving his position as husband, and she who forgets to offer her husband the delicate attentions which are his due is wholly unfit for her exalted station."

"Never introduce two people, unless you know that it is their desire to become acquainted. Always present the gentleman to the lady, never the lady to the gentleman. A gentleman should never offer his hand when introduced to a lady; if, for some reason, the lady wishes to be more gracious in her recognition, the hand may be touched lightly."

"True politeness is not a matter of outward accomplishment, it is a grace of the soul, inherent from nature. The Laws of Etiquette are but the regulators of this grace, which conforms it to the code universally understood and accepted."

"The true gentleman will always do homage to a woman, if for no other reason than that she is the Mother of the Race, and deserves in the main all the chivalry of his nature. To the young and beautiful woman hi is particularly polite and attentive, showering upon her the homage of eyes and lips to the degree which is compatible with dignity."

"The true gentleman will make no advances which he does not feel - he will whisper no vows that he does not intend keeping."

"The true woman...[will not] cast her net for promiscuous victims, only to mock their sufferings when her cruel pleasure is ended."

"It is by outward appearances that we are first enabled to differentiate between the intelligent and ignorant... we judge from his exterior...where he ranks in the mental, moral, financial and social status, and it is our first impression of him which assists us in forming an estimate of his character."

"What others think of you, not what you think of yourself, is the index of your position, and that they should think well of you is perhaps the first end in life which you should strive to accomplish."

"In passing, always turn to the right. This is a good rule to follow throughout life's whole pathway."

"If a stranger speaks to you, answer him politely. It is time enough to discontinue the conversation when he has proved himself undesirable"

"Do not tell your private affairs to those whom you meet... you are pretty sure to bore them."

"A gentleman should never escort a lady through the public entrance to a hotel... [she] should be taken through the private entrance and left in the parlor."

"Persons who meet at the house of a mutual friend and are not introduced, should never bow or recognize each other when they meet elsewhere. Never introduce two people, unless you know that it is their desire to become acquainted."

"Do not volunteer advice and when it is requested, give it sparingly. When a person asks your advice, he usually conceals half of the facts, and consequently places your judgment at a disadvantage."

"Do not talk of things that are not interesting to others."

"Because you are well-related, you need not be constantly referring to the fact. ... Do not affect and be what you are not. Nothing is so offensive as artificiality of manner."